To the driver of the fancy, smanchy little tuna can (yeah, I drive a SUV –what of it?) of a sports car in front of me this morning, I’d like to inform you that your car was meant to be driven faster than 40 mph. In fact, the speedometer on your teensy dashboard probably registers as high as 180 mph. Given the way you were handling your little high performance vehicle, (and by handling, I mean treating it as though it might break if you pushed the petal any further) I’d bet that you’ve never actually driven it faster than 80 mph. What a shame. Not only is your engine sorely underachieving, but you are pissing off those people that you block and delay as you cruise along hoping that everyone is admiring you.
Reality Check: we don’t care who you are, what kind of car you have, or how much money you want everyone to think you have. What we care about is that you move your wheels and stop slowing us all down. If you can’t drive it properly, then get off the road and out of the way ‘cause my big boat is coming through! Maybe you should limit your “cruising time” to Sunday afternoons when the roads are less congested and people are not in a rush to get to work.
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